August 6 new York city 2nd night God put a new day in the front of me. every new day is a banquet waiting for me to enjoy. i don't know much about New York. Christopher sent me a "must see" list: statue of liberty and ground zero. i know Statue of liberty. i was lady liberty in July 4th parade last year in Mendocino.i was so pround so happy on that day. as ground zero, i thought it might be a flat place with a piece of stone writing history of 911. i am not a history person, and i normally don't tend to recall disaster back into my mind.but what Christopher told me is always important. when a woman falls in love with a man, she lost her own mind and take his as hers. so i decided i will go to see the statue of liberty today and gound zero tomorrow. I walked on broadway. for a long time i thought "broadway" is a theater for performing musicals. years ago i loved to watch musicals and tried to write musical scripts.i wrote some fairy tale or romantic stories in lyrics, and dreamed they will be performed in broadway someday. finally i understand broadway is a big road. several cities in the US have broadway. Jesus said the small gate and the narrow road is to life, the broad way is to destruction, i hope my musical scripts get life on broadway. Jesus is the road, the life and the truth. i walked on broadway toward the statue of liberty. Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, this trinity is what i am doing now. I came to a place, people crowded outside and inside.i followed the flow. when you don't know where you should go, broadway is your way. when you don't know in which side God is, stand in people's side. after a while of looking and reading, i understood where i was, here is memorial hall of 911, so i guessed ground zero must be nearby. out of the back yard of memorial hall, i was on another street, here even more people, every one was walking slowly, no space for you to stop or speedy, so kept moving with the main stream that's good for social stability. following all sights drection i looked at the big buildings. what's that? it's ground zero! that surprised my head. the most high skyline in New York is here. the US is rebuiding it! no one can beat you down if God lift you up. America, the greatest country on earth. On the year 2003, in Shigatse, Tibet, China, I met a muslim man Mr. Ma from Gansu province. My friend Zhou Ruyao was with me at that time, Zhou is an environmental protection volunteer, he walked by his feet along the Yellow River from its begining in Qinghai to the end next to ocean in Shangdong in a year and 4 months, to investigate pollution. Ma is around 6o years old, a friendly man. in his place, Zhou and he had a nice talk about his family, home town, business and muslim culture. when Zhou asked " what do you think about 911?" "they should have been bombed." Ma answered. i was shocked, i felt the fear full of my whole body. the "terrorist" was not from morning news through radio, or a word printed on newspaper, or on the other side of the earth. i felt it was so real so close, it was in this room , in the front of me, around me. i guessed Zhou also started to feel uncomfortable. Ma explained his opinion by his Allah' will. he was so calm, looked no hate no love in his emotion, only Allah's will going on earth. that even made me more fearful.after a little while Ma pointed the oclock on the wall, told us that certain time came,so he needed to pray. i mentined to Zhou that we should leave, so Ma may have quite time to pray. Zhou agreed and we left quickly. that was 9 years ago. now Zhou become famous for his project in China. i was happy to know him and joined in his work. after 20 days, i continued my trip by myself. i hope Ma is doing well too. today as an American, seeing "ground zero" is growing into a amazing beauty, my heart is touched and proud of this great country. before i get to the statue of liberty, i have seen the ground zero first. something was beyond my mind, it is higher than my thought. to see ground zero was not my plan , i just took Christopher's as mine. a woman's wisdom is not enough to make decision, but love makes woman smarter. when a rib combines itself with a man, it becames a part of a man, it shares the power and glory of God. a woman's wisdom is in love. it is not far from ground zero to the cruise port to Ellis island. from the bank you can see the statue of liberty through ocean fog. i thought the time is still early, so i looked around in the bay park, and then lay down on a bench under shade of trees. i need a nap because i had half night stand and half night sit on last night. i heard laughing. i saw the green robe with crown among a group people, they were having fun to put on the costume of lady liberty and take photos. that is not new for me. a year ago, I was Lady laberty in July 4th parade in Mendocino. i worked in Compassrose Leather shop at that time, the boss Ed is the leader of the parade every year.i told him i wanted to walk in parade, he asked me "what role you want to play? " " can i wear uniform, hold gun, walk in the front line? " "No." "why?" "those are coast guards." " can i walk next to them?" " No." "why?" "that's for fire trucks." i don't know what costume i should wear, Ed suggested me to be lady liberty. at that evening, when i came back home, i checked the cabinet and looked for the quilt cover. i rembered it is light green. i found it. i was sure it is right color. i searched on computer to look at the picture of statue of liberty carefully. i was a well trained engineer, even i was retired from that job many years ago, i believed it was not difficult thing for me to make a set of costume. i did often design and sewing clothes for myself before. now i need to make clothes for lady liberty.i disassembled it into 4 basic parts: robe, hat(crown), book(tablet) and torch. i made robe first, a dress without sleeves, a piece of rectangle fabric hanging freely cross shoulder. the robe was done. the book is the simplest part. i thought to take a real book, just take Bible. but real book would be too heave, it is not convenient to carry and lift it up or wave to people. i found a empty cheese cracker box on the stool next the door, Sean was going to throw it in recycle barrel, i took it and covered with same fabric, and then wrote JULY IV MDCCLXXVI. the book was done. the torch cost me little bit more mind. i saved a core roll of paper towel when i cleaned the vacation house Tide Pool, i used it as the rod, covered with the fabiric. the flame was made of Santa Claus ' hat, i kneaded some newspaper to put inside. the torch was done. the last thing was crown. it looked so complicated. finally i simplified it into two parts, a circular hoop and 7 pieces of triangles. carton board is the material. after well cutting in right measurement for my head, i covered every part with fabric, so they can have same color with the robe, and then sew them together. and i drew some windows on the hoop. the crown is well done! i put the robe on, held the book in left hand, lifted the torch in right hand, the crown was on my head. i looked at the mirror at the middle night 2am while my sweet husband Sean and soft dog Henry were sleeping. cool! i am lady liberty. i cleaned up the left carton board and fabric, put the sewing kit back in its place. i folded the costume on the table, the book on the robe, the crown on the book. i enjoyed the work , and now watched them, i felt so happy. and then i went to my dream land. God worked 6 days and looked at his work and felt good, then go to rest. i worked 6 hours, i had same feeling as God did. next morning when i got up, Sean told me how he was amazed when he saw the crown, he thought I may could make the robe, but he couldn't imagine the crown is homemade too. i put on the costume, asked Sean to take some photos of me, and then emailed several friends, told them "lady liberty will come to Mendocino on July 4th." i did not send them to many people, because if they see the picture, they will not feel fun when they see me in parade. July 4th came. beautiful lady liberty just got out of gate, a car stopped, offered me a ride to town. i just got out of car, i heard someone shouted "lady liberty", a man asked to take a photo of me. so i did a pose to his camera. i went to Crown Hall to take number. i got no.12. and then i went to look for the place in line. i found the No.11, it was a rock band on a open truck. i stood behind them. we waited in line and moved in order, i saw my boss Ed standing on side, he was working as an organizer. i rushed out of line and jumped up to hug him. i have to "jump" when i hug him, because he is the tallest person in Mendocino plus Fort Bragg area. if you don't jump, you might take risk to turn a hug into a hang. he was so happy to see me, he might just mentioned his sugestion of lady liberty, and then he saw her with his eyes. when the next Friday i worked in Compassrose, Ed told me he was suprised the comtume i made was so well. he had thought it would be very simple one. the parade started. i was so excited, i smiled and waved. when the procession turned into main street, i found Kathy in the audience, "Spring!" she ran into line to hug me. she is so nice lady, always looks like a queen, because she maried king. i thought that was interesting, i just ran out to hug her husband, and then she ran in to hug me. when we passed the rostrum, i heard the host read "No.12, Lady Liberty." it was my turn, i showed my big face smile and waved, and waved to the judges seating on the stage. when i came back home, Sean told me i should not wave with my two arms up, i should keep the left arm holding the book beside body and lift the torch in right arm , same as the posture of statue of liberty. i said that would make my arms tired very soon. Sean suggested me," you can change." that meant from time to time i use right hand to hold the book, left hand hold the torch, so both arms can take a break. i even did not think of that. lady liberty might be left handed. look! man is always smarter than woman. Sean is my head. God put him in that position. anyway, lady liberty is alive one, not statue. i even won a vote. when i worked in Ed's store, Suzi came to tell me she thought i was so good in parade, she voted me. i was happy to know that even i did not get prize. perhaps other judges are married, so they could not take the love of lady liberty. we were marching on Lansing street. i saw Morgan with his little daughter Meili on side in the crowd. i shouted " Morgan, Morgan, Meili," Morgan never "see" me, never "hear" me, even here thousands people on noon can prove our relationship is pure neighbor. one time he did see me and i did hear him. that was a quarter mile away. i heard "Spring!", it was Morgan, he waved to me from outside store, while i was walking on road. i am sure his eyes and ears are in perfect health if only God is watching. wife covered your eyes and ears, but God open them. God is good. He bless us with independent day for the US. we depend on God. I had big fun on that day. When I see statue of laberty or anywhere someone wears the costume, it always reminds me of my joy on that day. Several years ago, I tried to write a musical script, the subject is about lady liberty. i can't remember the story clearly now. outline is that lady liberty 's lover Mr. Liberty preaches freedom to the forbidden city arounded by great wall. he was put in prison. she rescued him. finally the great wall was broken down, the forbidden city became liberal country. i couldn't design a better plot. i normaly like hero story that describes man, not woman. i am a big fan of Anorld Schwarzenegger. except beautiful muscles, he always successfully recused wife or daughter in his films. this subject is related to politics, i am not good at this either. but i respect politicians. they might be too important for me to talk or write. the shade of tree moved with the sun, i followed the shade to another bench, i noticed the handsome young man was gone, he was reading book on the next bench. i continued my nap.that was the payment for last night stand. it's time to check some fun. i got up. there was an half mile line in the front of the box office, another half mile line waiting for the boat to liberty island. my mind struggled on math work: $17 ticket and a mile waiting. Ali told me there is free ferry we can see the statue of liberty on boat, "you can see two times." i decided to take the free ferry. when i passed by a food stall, i was lured by the churros. the first time i ate churros was in Tijuana, Mexico. i and Jeff waited in line for the border passport checking. Jeff bought a bag of snack from roadside. i did not know its name at that time. Jeff told me, i forgot.Warren told me, Christopher told me, finally i know it is churro. i like it. now churro is in the front of me. i asked the ower how much its price."$3." i thought $3 for a bag, that is ok, this bag looked bigger than that $1 bag of Tijuana. " $3 is for each one." i thought here is tourist resort, so it is more expensive. i canceled a part desire of my stomach , and bought one churro. this churro is not that churro. i miss the churros of Tijuana, i miss Jeff. i think someday i will go to Mexico to eat churros. someday i may see Jeff again. Staten Island Ferry is a big building. the waiting hall is full. a couple behind me are from Canada, they know more information about the free ferry than i do. i see, they are "free" hobbyists too. we got on the board, it was a big boat. people crowded on deck, i tried to catch some view through the gaps among people's heads. as the boat was going away from the harbor, New York became a magic city on water. the statue of liberty was getting bigger and clearer, almost all passangers came to same side of boat. lady liberty, she attracted all sights. men were born free.women were born in chains. there are many researches about why the statue of liberty took a female form, not a male. the only reason i can think of is that men love free women. if you interpret my last sentence as sex without pay, i will not count you as misunderstanding, i believe men or we all like to be free from bills. but here what i am saying is trust and love. there are too much doubt, fear even hate in women 's mind, these are three mountains that block women from God's grace. God bless women through men, women receive lives from men. but many women put doubt, fear, hate such walls between themsleves and men. those are chains bound women's hands and feet. so women can't go close to men. so man, not woman, made the statue of liberty, what he wanted to say is, beak your chains, trust me! love me! for any New York first timer, this 30 minutes trip is great voyage. i took another nap in our beautiful destination. while i was enjoying the rest, mosquitoes and some UFOs visited me, they turned my sweet daydream into big itch. i wake up, i saw several big red on my arms and legs, those are the places my wing fans kissed. it was late afternoon. i went back to the pier to wait ferry to take me back to New York. i even felt this is more beautiful ride than we left, perhapes the angle is different, and coming closer gives people stronger feeling than leaving away. but the interesting thing was there were not that many people as before crowed on the deck, that excitement was only for maiden voyage, not for the sencond timer or old hands. a tourist day was passing out, i started to think of my new mission: where will i sleep tonight? I have a paper it has all shelter names and addresses of new York city. this morning on the way to ground zero, i walked in a shelter, the man who works there told me they accept only men, not women. he gave a me this list and circled two of them, those are for women. I thought I may try the closest one, i still have some obstacles in my mind to sleep outside. I hope i have a bed to sleep better after one night stand. So I walked toward that direction to the address. Along the road from time to time , from where to where, I saw some people are ready to sleep, they were just happy they could be, some were still working, holding sign "need help" . I thought i may ask to join in them? or sleep by myself ? I kept walking, when I came to a big church, I decided to stop here, this is my bedroom for tonight. I saw a black young man sleeping on the steps this morning when i passed here. He wore beautiful suit, there were two big suitcases beside him. He looked far away homeless style, more like a businessman just got out of airport. I don't know his story, why he slept on street. but tonight this is my spot. I don't sleep on steps, that is not even, I stay close to the door as I can, the porch can protect me if it rains. the store in cross street is open 24 hours, it sells Deli and flowers. i was sure broadway traffic lights are on through all nights. i don't sleep in park, i need light. I knelt down and prayed to God: heavenly father, please protect me, give me a peaceful night. i think this was the first time that i asked God for protection. even many people reminded me hitchhiking is dangerous, i have never felt that. i just lift a short prayer, i was shy to kneel down on street side long time, this is public place even it is night. God, please prapare me. in Buffulo when I was at Michael 's home, I slept on his balcony a night. when i saw the foldable bed there, i thought that would be cool if i sleep here, i like to try new things. it was a beautiful night, twinkling twinkling little stars were watching me, even there was some nervousness in my mind, but i told myself "i am at home, Michael and Brian are just here with me." when the birds singing brought a new day to my ears, i knew the night was past. i was indeed not out of home, both in law and in feeling, the balcony is a part of the house, so i was still in Michael's place, he was my master my lord, i knew i was not alone. And as materially, i had a bed, i was on upstairs, not on roadside.i knew where i go when i felt cold, i got up and went inside to take a blanket in the early morning. this is street of New York, it is night, Michael and Brian are hundreds miles away. but God is here. I put a piece of plastic on the concret ground, used backpack as pillow, hanged the small bag crossing my body, there were ID and passport and money and bank card inside. this is in case if someone takes my bag away i will wake up. if any one wants my pillow, they can have it. the bedding works well. before i started this trip, i prepared it at home. i folded a king size sheet and sewed it into an envelop. now I put myself inside. if you put a stamp and write address: dreamland, that is just where I want to go tonight. i was lying there and felt fun, so i took a photo of myself on ipod. i am not a bitter person at all, i can find happiness in almost any situation. i remembered this morning i saw a young couple with big dog slept together on sidewalk, the girl was inside next to wall, and then the man and then the dog. i sent them a smile when i passed by. home is where love is, i believe they were sleeping at home. God indeed gave me a man and a dog, they are in my heart, not by my side. i kept the bible and a bottle of water beside me. the bible is small book of new testment. i had thought to take my bilingual bible, my friend Yansong Li bought it for me when i was baptized. finally i picked up this pamphlet because of weight. i thought if anyone with sinful heart visits me during my sleeping, they may see the bible and this bottle of water. water is the most basic need as a human: brother, this is just what i have and what i need. i am a human, same as you. here is church, this is bible, i am the smallest sister of Jesus, i worth your love, God will pay you back in double. both my wallet and my flesh never want to turn you into a criminal. when the ipod showed me battery was exausted, my night life was over. I put on the long sleeves jaket in case cold at night and it coated my colorful shirt too. i covered my head inside the sheet, at least I did not want other people to know I am a woman sleeping alone on street. but i forgot my sheet is white with flower pattern. ;) "hello, hello," i was surprised. really, someone comes! i stretched my head out, and sat up, i could not see him clearly because of light, his hand held something toward me. this is my vigin night to sleep ouside by myself, even i prayed to God, even i chose the location carefully,even what i have seen others gave me courage, but i have not enough experience, i could not conquer woman's weakness and cast all fear out. it was $5 bill in my hand now. "take care!" he left. this was my first visitor. my heart was touched, tears were in my eyes. I prayed for him. God, how good you are, i just could not imagine. dried up tears, and with touching heart, i went back my envelope, and sealed it again. "hello, hello," someone comes! i stretched my head out, and sat up. " are you ok?" " i am ok." "are you ok? " " i am ok." i believe he asked "are you ok?" that meant concerning and care. his regard warmed my heart. he left. i went back my envelope, and sealed it again. "hello, hello," my God, policeman comes! i thought policeman will not allow me to sleep here. i stretched my head out, and sat up. thank God, i see, he is not police officer. "we are all in God." his hand held something to me. it was $10 bill. he left. i prayed and cried, my heart was full of appreciation. God's love covers me even i was on street, God's eyes were watching me even i was in night. this was my third visitor. i lay back into the envelope, before sealed it well, a man came. he is the same person, he walked away just 1-2 minutes and walked back. " i give you more. we are all in God." another $5 was in my hand now. i totally agreed with him, we are all in God. he is blessed! you may noticed that i had three night visitors, but i cried two times. i had no tears for the second one, while i was so grateful to his kindness. you might think there is money, there is tears; no money, no tears. that was true in this very case. another example might prove you too. when i left San Diego, Sam dropped me at the entrance. after a little while, Sam drove back, while i was waiting for a ride. he handled $10 to me through the window. he left. i watched his car and tears flooded my face with sweeping, i even could not continue hitchhiking, i became a totally crying person on roadside. when Sam dropped me off, i might be with reluctance to part, but i did not cry. he left his kindness and beauty in my heart. when he drove back with $10 in his hand for me, i whole person was buried in my tears. there is money, there is tears. no money, no tears. but i don't know if that is true? i ever cried three times for one farewell. there was no money related in that story. he was Christopher. he was leaving for Reno, Nevada, after picking me up every evening in one and half months. that was the last time he drove me home. he left. i entered into my gate and stood in yard a few minutes, i tried to calm down my emotion. when i went to upstair, i saw Sean was reading book on bed. i rushed into his arms and held him, i cried loudly: "i think i fall in love with him. he is leaving tomorrow." i cried, i cried. money can't buy love, but money can express love. the poor widow gave two mites because she loved God. she did not think to buy blessing from God, she wanted to give her love to God. money is carrier of love when you give. tears are silent language of love when you receive. Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! my night visitors of New York are blessed. Sam of San Diego is blessed. Christopher of my heart is blessed. i am blessed! the fourth visitor did not come. the rest of night was peaceful.